Easter

I was a little apprehensive to attend church this morning, only because the usual English service was going to merge with the larger Korean one. I knew that I wouldn't be able to comprehend what was said and I had this idea that because the church is more formal that I wouldn't be able to relate. I was wrong.

I got there slightly early (this is a first for me - I'm always running late to church) and had some awkward conversations with some sweet Korean women. It wouldn't have been awkward, except that one lady I was trying to communicate with didn't know how to answer in English (and obviously I know very little Korean) so the third girl that we were talking with was translating our conversation. But they were sweet, none the less.

During the service, I sat with all the foreigners, in a spot designated for us. I received a little ear piece from Myoung, who would be translating the message. He's Korean but grew up in Germany and knows English. Such a smart guy. So I got to hear a Korean sermon in a German accent this morning!

I was able to follow along with some of the songs as they either had the lyrics in English as well as Korean, or the songs were familiar enough that I could remember them and sing against the syllables of the opposite language. The topic of the sermon was not the normal "Jesus died, was buried and rose again, hallelujah, etc, etc," which can be wonderful but since I grew up going to church, I've heard that sermon for about two decades now. The reading was from Luke 24:13-34. The gist of the story was this: Jesus had already risen and appeared before the women, while the men were disbelieving and quite forlorn. The men were returning home, downcast and defeated. How was it, that these disciples, the ones that had followed Jesus for a couple of years during his life, were now giving up, only three days after his death? In verse 15-17:

"As they talked and discussed these things with each other, Jesus himself came up and walked along with them; but they were kept from recognizing him. He asked them, 'What are you discussing together as you walk along?' They stood still, their faces downcast."

Cleopas, one of the men there, looked right at Jesus, spoke to him and didn't know that he was the Christ and alive. WHAT. Why are they so dense??!

But this is a perfect parallel to our lives. WE are so dense. We fail to see Jesus right in front of us, calling to us and showing us the pathway of peace. The disciples were so distracted with the "failure" of Jesus' life, believing it was all over, that they couldn't see their living, breathing Messiah. In verse 31, after having a meal with Jesus, their eyes were opened and they were amazed. We need to having "burning hearts," (v. 32) for the Lord and know that we are blessed  and victorious, even when life seems impossible.

After the service, we were roped into decorating Easter eggs and then going out to the streets and evangelizing, passing out the decorated eggs. Now, I've never been one to dig going up to a random stranger and saying, "Hey, have ya heard about this guy named Jesus?" I find it so impersonal. You're striking up a conversation with someone you don't know (not wholly bad, in my mind. I enjoy meeting new people.) but then immediately delving into the dark crevices of their heart. That's so invasive for not knowing the person. I'd much prefer getting to know that person, investing in them, letting them know that they are loved, and SHOWING them God's love, rather than telling. After all, an ounce of action is worth a pound of words.

That said, this didn't frighten me too much, because we volunteered a couple of weeks ago to witness to foreigners outside the World Cup Stadium. My wonderful friend, Carolyn-from-South-Africa and I, make a nice evangelist team - we're both outgoing and pretty good with chit-chat which makes it easy to strike up a conversation with strangers. This time, as were scouting for fresh sinful meat, we happened upon some of the same foreigners that we had connected with on our last outreach. It was cool to see how God put them there and us there at the same time to build a relationship. We didn't talk about Jesus the whole time. We mentioned him, yeah, but mostly asked about them, their lives, their interests, and Jesus happened to be thrown in when they asked questions in return. I appreciate how God orchestrated it - and humbled that I could be used by him. I hope more good things come out of the what we're laying a foundation for.

a few things

I think this will be a bulleted post, as I don't feel like being eloquent:

- This was a glorious week. It went quickly. It was amazing. The weather is getting warmer. I am high on endorphins right now.
- I found the Central Park of Gwangju! My nostrils were as wide as my eyes, trying to take in all the wonderful, sweet nature smells. I don't get enough of that living in a city. I was pleased to discover that Korea does have a springtime(!!) It had been cold for so long, I was going a little crazy.
- I went jogging for over a half hour! Granted, it wasn't 40 consecutive minutes - I needed to stop for a breather about 10 minutes in, but I'm amazed at what my body can do! Just a couple months ago, I couldn't run 10 minutes without getting winded.
- I'm really getting into this God stuff. I know, I've been a Christian basically all my life - but it's taken me about 15 years to be hungry for the good stuff. He's providing so much more than I could ever imagine: money, friends and just general joy.
- Dare I say that I'm beginning to like living here....??? This week has ranged from satisfactory to elation, which is basically a spectrum of goodness.

I will leave you with pic of me immediately after my run, photos of my children and even a video!

Enjoy.

The weight's FINALLY back. Yeah, I know, I still look skinny. But guys, my weight for many years has been that of a toothpick. It (my weight) was so up and down last year with all the transitions that were stressing me out. I'm a piggy eater when I live alone, but it translates well. I'm still workin' on it...gaining, that is.

Alright, enough with the GPOY.

Children:

Candy. I don't know why Korea is crazy about this name. I think they're unaware that it's a popular stripper name...seriously, everyone's name is Candy. Even my renegade, pink fish.

Jade, the camera hog. This kid LOVES taking pictures. I wish this wasn't blurry.

Sandy-Dandy. I told her that is my grandma's name. She didn't know what to think.

Silly faces.

Pondering the food pyramid.

My little ham-bone, Alex.

It's a jolly holiday with Jolly...! I sing that at her all the time and now the other kids have picked up on it. I think there's something wrong with her vocal chords - she has the voice of a fly.

Jade and Izzy

Izzy girl

Oh, Christina. Her mom is always writing me notes asking if she's speaking English well and expressing herself. I think this definitely counts as self-expression.

Looking to get a laugh from her classmates. She's my female class clown.

My kids are quite punny. They say things like, (on Tuesday) "Today is TOOTHday!!" and point to their little chicklet teeth. Or they call me Monkey Teacher, instead of Margy Teacher. Here, they are demonstrating that they think the little red fruit that you make into jam are called STRONGberries.

Banana eyes.

Everyday I WANT TO EAT THEM UP

I was so pleased with her dress. I think her mom made it...

Jolly's always creepin' on me haha.Those little teeth and her smirk-y face.

What took up circle time this week.

This baby makes me want a Korean baby. He asks way too many questions but is so sweet. The other day, I was speaking sternly to them and said, "If you have a question please raise your hand!" Johnny raised his hand and after I called on him, he said, "I love you, Margy Teacher...?" MELTS. MY. HEART.

Wild in the hallways. This is not allowed usually, but I mean, I want kids to be kids, you know?

Lining up for the bathroom. They're well-behaved when they want to be.

I do this about 6 times a day: stand and wait for them to use the bathrooms. We've gotten pretty good at it.

Who wouldn't love a face like this??!

iiiiiittttt's Humpday.

That's right, ladies and gentlemen - the week is more than halfway over. Eesh. I'm finding that the weeks are moving quickly, it's just during the day that I feel time dragging. I'm beginning to wonder if I'm actually doing any good for my children. I mean, we have a great time, we're singing and dancing and playing and learning (I think.) That's the tough part: I'm not sure how to gauge the progress. Some days are fantastic! The kids understand everything and I feel like we're flying. Other days...well, I want to rip my hair out from their lack of cooperation. I suppose I shouldn't stress too much - and I won't. It's just something I wonder...

It's kind of nice playing mom every day. I like it. The cool thing is, I get to give them back at the end of the day. :-D

Soooooo here's to eating leftover Indian food from an amazing little place downtown, to chillin' in my little nest of an apartment and to not having a care until 9:10 tomorrow morning. Good night.

Gwangju Soccer

Have I mentioned that I am exactly where God wants me to be?

I knew that this South Korea thing happened quickly, and I didn't even think that perhaps I was getting into the best possible circumstances. Most of the events leading up to coming here came and went smoothly. I was able to get my paperwork in before the deadline and I was placed with a school that acts more like a family than an employer. For instance: my boss covered my medical expenses about a month ago when I was in the hospital with no insurance and $95 short of being able to pay the bill. I was floored that he was so quick to pay my way, and even more astounded when he didn't take the money I owed him out of my paycheck. He just let it go. He said it was fine. I spoke with his wife (the other boss) and she said he was glad to do it, and that he doesn't do that for everyone. Thank you, Lord, for giving me favor when I specifically asked for it!

Other than just being here, and being with an amazing organization, I wasn't sure that I had a real purpose. Sure, I wanted to pay off loans - but that's every ex-college student's job. We are slaves to our educational dept. I knew I wanted to travel and see new places (and I did not prepare myself for living in a land where I was an alien,) but I didn't know exactly why I was here.

I'm still kind of fuzzy on this subject, but God is beginning to reveal hints of a reason: Elijah's story about wanting to hear God through a fire, an earthquake, and a storm, but only really hearing the Lord through a whisper of a wind, has really struck a chord with me. A friend mentioned it a couple days ago and I've been studying that subject in the Bible. Just last night, I received prayer from someone that doesn't even know me, and lives on the other side of the world. It said this:

Lord God I lift up my sister to You. I thank You that You’re bringing her into a new season. I thank You that You have made her whole! I thank You that the old has gone and the new is here. I thank You that You are stripping away sin and pride and selfishness and replacing that heart of stone with a heart of flesh. I thank You that she longs to know and love You more and more. Father, open up her ears to hear Your voice. Lord, You are never silent; Jesus Christ was the greatest revelation of who You are, and we have Your very Word, complete and accessible to us. Your Spirit speaks, Your Spirit speaks. Sometimes You choose to speak in funny ways - not in the wind or fire or earthquake, but in a whisper. You speak in the finest of whispers. Spirit, work in my sister’s heart so she can hear Your voice clearly. Help her to hear Your voice through Your body, and help her to always hear You through her daily bread. In Jesus’ Name I pray, Amen.

All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness.
- 2 Timothy 3:16

For the word of God is living and active,sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.
- Hebrews 4:12

How can it be that this woman has never met me, and yet knows me? What she prayed isn't vague stuff. It's really me she's talking about!! God is so cool. He brings spirits together and we are close because of him. He allows relationships to take leaps that otherwise would stay surface-y and shallow. I recently met a friend and we've only known each other a couple of weeks. This girl and I are from totally different sides of the world and our testimonies are radically different - but we have God in common. Since we met, we've felt a mutual bond that we can't explain. As if we've been in each other's lives for years.

God bridges so many cultures. He brought me here to hide me, to let me regroup, to refocus, to get back to him. To realize that he is bigger than the US, that he is a God of many nations and that there are people that don't even speak my language that I can connect with about him.

When I typed "bridges" just now, I was reminded that it was a word I received just a couple of weeks before I departed for Korea. I wasn't sure what I was supposed to do with it. Still not sure if there's anything to do with it, but at least life is beginning to make more sense.

Lord, please open my ears to hear you, my eyes to see you more clearly, and my heart to love you more everyday. I want to love the people you created. Give me a heart that is tender. Break it all into pieces.

Pun-days

I'm beginning to understand what my coworkers meant when they said that after a while, I would see mini versions of me running around my class room. This morning, one of my more precocious children said, "Today is TOOTHday!! (Tuesday)" It's humor like this, along with kids being bossy and singing randomly that make me smile. Sound familiar, Mom?

Catching happiness

I think when I'm going through something, (like discontentment,) I need to share it with other people so that I can grasp it better. Many times I think that if I just live here or just work at this job, or if my hair just looked like that, or if I could only date the man of my dreams, that life would fall into place and I would be happy. Well, sometimes, I've been able to live in a place I'm really in love with. Sometimes I've loved my job, and sometimes my hair looks amazing. As for the man of my dreams - well, here's to hoping he exists. I've had some wonderful times in my life already; but these things are fleeting. Nothing is forever, nothing stays the same. Good and bad, it all fluctuates. Once I realized that I should be chasing after God, and not these things on earth for fulfillment and happiness, was when my whole outlook on life turned around.

If you think that by getting what you want you'll be happy - you're wrong. You might be happy for a time, but you will become restless, entitled and want more of something else. 

That's not to say that I don't get distracted with life's wealth or the happiness it pretends to promise. I often get incredibly discouraged. However, it's in those times that I need to seek the Lord more. He will give me a spirit of contentment and happiness wherever I am. 

My prayer is this, dear friends and family: if you are struggling with contentment in your life, please stop trying to fill it with things the world can give you. You will only be left with a dull, aching hunger. Know that God loves you so much - he's waiting for you to call on him so that he can sustain you.

Chuck Swindoll, in his book: Living on the Ragged Edge, writes:

In this ragged-edged reality called earthly existence, life is somewhere between sad and bad. All it takes is a quick look around to discover why we line up to watch fantasies that take us to galaxies far, far away. Who wouldn't want to escape from an existence as boring and painful as ours? For many, it's downright horrid. It's drug abuse. It's sleepless nights. It's headaches. It's heartaches. It's hate, rape, assault, jail sentences. It's sickness and sorrow. It's broken lives. It's distorted minds. Mainly, as Solomon discovered long ago, it's empty. There's nothing down here under the sun that will give you and me a sense of lasting satisfaction. It is planned that way! How else would we realize our need for the living God?

I don't care how good your professional practice is, much of it is boring. I don't care how big your house is or how exciting your future is. I don't care how hard you work or how large your paycheck or how sincere your efforts, when you boil life down to the nubbies... when the lights are turned off at night, you're back to reality--its boring and horribly empty. To quote Solomon the realist, it is like chasing the wind.

You work so that you can make money, so that you can spend it, so that you can work and make more money, so that you can spend it, so that you can get more, which will mean you spend more, and your work harder to make more. So goes this endless cycle called 'striving after wind.'

That explains why people will line up by the millions to view a fantasy on film and sit in silent amazement at someone's imaginary world of imaginary characters who do imaginary things--because life under the sun is so dreadfully, unchangingly boring.

To put it bluntly, life on planet Earth without God is the pits. And if I may repeat my point (Solomon does numerous times), that's the way God designed it. He made it like that. He placed within us that God-shaped vacuum that only He can fill. Until He is there, nothing satisfies (page 85f).